Tuesday, April 10, 2012

After Darkness Comes Light

I have a story to share. Yesterday, my friend came over and we went out for brunch. I have known her for about 2 over years now. She had breast cancer about 6 years ago and went into remission about three years ago. During her pre-cancer days, she was running a small noodle stall supporting a family of three (other half and a daughter). The other half was a dreamer, always thinking how to make it big in business. Without much capital and knowledge of the business, he insisted into going into business and twice it failed. So the wife have to sell properties to pay off some debts. As if not enough, he held no regular jobs after that, hung out mainly in bars and was involved with some China dolls. She was so stressed having to earn a living and take care of the family. This has been going on for 10 years. Due to insufficient sleep, she was involved in two accidents while driving. Meanwhile her sister has suggested that she leave her husband. Her mother was not supportive preferring her to stay in marriage. Being the timid women she was then, she hung on to the marriage out of fear. She said she struggled for 10 years and still could not decide to leave the marriage. Then she was diagnosed with breast cancer and got no help from her other half. It was this cancer that she got her realisation and decided to divorce her husband. I told her that was the best thing she did and even before her breast cancer, she was having spouse cancer! Together with the support of her sister, she went through chemotherapy all by herself. At that time, she told me she has no money in her bank account. She had to borrow from her sister. She regretted that she bought one apartment that was registered in her husband's name. Obviously when the apartment was sold, the money did not go to her. Luckily for some insurance payment, she used part of the money for treatment and balance of it to buy another apartment. I told her that by divorcing her husband, it helped her in the cancer recovery, a changing point in her life. Breast cancer are normally associated with problems with the other half or family members. Her finances became better as she now have only one daughter to support. Although she has not achieved financial independence yet, she is on her way. Her daughter is now grown up and working. Incredible women having gone through so much pain and hurt in her life. Beaming with happiness and confidence now, she is enjoying her new lease of life.

I told her when we next meet for lunch, we will celebrate life and her freedom. Some old memories still haunt her. For example, she drives a manual car instead of an automatic drive. Her memories of the car accident during her relationship with her ex husband. She said that period was one low point in her life. A friend once told me, the gift of awakening is the best gift in life one can have. I told her that too. While you can't change history, we can at least learn from it. Taking the first step to change oneself is the most difficult. It demands not only courage but a lot of will power.

4 comments:

  1. Dear CT,

    Encouraged by your blog. My wife had breast cancer so I understand the helplessness and desperation one can get. I found my strength in God and in my search for a cure for my wife's cancer, stumbled upon a man who had an aloe herbal formulation (Oncovit) that worked for us. My wife is now recovered. If anyone wants to give this formulation a try, can email me at aloelifesolution@gmail.com. Want to help others if possible - sharing solutions and seeing others getting a second chance in life is one of the greatest joy in life.

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  2. CT,

    You carry the Easter message whether you know it or not...and then, there was light...

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  3. Chang,

    This is what I admire you most, you care for others

    Good to have friend like you,

    rgds,

    NKP

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  4. Correct saying. if you face your problems with proper way and patience then you will always get good results. Same thing in any long illness like cancer, heart attack, asthma, Heart Transplantation etc, we need give good care and also take medicine and perfect treatment then we must get positive results.

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